Monday, December 03, 2007

Pins & Needles.

Happy Monday :)

A lot of talk today, a little less motivation, weather is really nice in the morning with a colder spark during the night and yes we are all prisoners of this wonderful yet vengeful city.

This blog always represented me and my thoughts. I always speak my mind out in here just like I do in my daily life. I always share new things with you that you have never heard me say. That doesnt mean I'm rewriting history, that means that I always tell you the truth about who I am and what I believe in my heart.

Life is a duplicate of the zoo. The difference between people and me is the that they remind me of the animals in the zoo, while I am the tourist who is wearing a large green shirt and sitting on the bench, which is located right in the middle of the zoo.

My friends hate each other, believe it or not they do. They are weird and they act weird. They count their stupid steps before taking them. They sit together every single day full of hatred, and it gets only bitter. They would wait for the right moment to hurt you. They would knock you down if they get the chance. They only want to get better so they can tease you. They dress good just to look better. They buy cars just to impress girls. They go to the gym to be associated with the strong and needy. They think about money all the time: how to make it, how to spend it, and how to invest it. They are becoming rusty and cold. They are vampires living under the same sun, unaffected, yet traumatized of never ending selfishness. Every single one of them lost the charm that signaled him before. Their bodies are covered with yellow dirt that will no longer be washed and no matter how much more they change, the slower and less they will feel a thing.

God saved my life. No, this is not a typographical error, so I will say it again just to be sure...God saved my life. I always pray to find some clarity and solace. I ask God to help me change the direction of my life, my negative attitudes, and to heal my broken heart. Now, some may scoff at the notion that God saved my life, or changed my life at all. Anyone could opine that it is all in my mind. I have met strangers down the years who told me that I saved their lives. Many have said that they had recently been contemplating suicide, and that my attitude had helped them to find the courage to not do such a horrible thing. Others would argue about whether they could find the strength to get out of bed, to face another day of their often unhappy life. They would say that a particular word, or something I had done, had reminded them of their own dreams. Now did I actually come into their room? Did I hold their hand to keep them from jumping out a window, or from cutting their arms, or from throwing up their dinner so they wouldn't gain weight, or keep them from taking drugs? The answer is no, I didn't. I was not there for them like their parents, or husband, or wife, or best friend. But I did help save their life.

Be well, stay safe, enough for now...but there is always more.

1 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Its not enough to say sorry and its not enough to try and fix things, sometimes as you said sherif you just ask God to help... Some say you can regret things but accept what your delt but you said it before in your blog hold on fight for what you have and regain what you lost. I am on my knees begging for your forgiveness and showing everyone what an idiot i was becuase i dont want to just accept things... I am truly sorry...

you need to be there for thoese you love i wasnt. you need to put them on a pedestal i didnt but i know for sure that i love you, and you know what thats enough, really it is. you will always be put above the world to me even when i dont show it. you smile and the world is happy again...

I need your forgiveness and most of all i need you and want you... regret is not enough but ana tobt and only God knows that i hope that he can show you how sorry i am...

A final prayer to you whos the world to me forgive me and if not then be happy in life, you deserve more then what the world can provide you ...

im keeping this annoymous beucase you know who i am thats enough for me....

Monday, January 07, 2008 4:43:00 PM  

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